SAT., DEC. 24, 2005
Last week the president of Iran called the Holocaust a myth. His statements were a huge shock to a world that expects slack-jawed idiocy of this sort to come primarily from American fundamentalists, the same thick-headed hayseeds who believe that evolution is a crock cooked up by Satan’s minions. Sure, Ahmadinejad’s comments were a bit over the top, especially since there are plenty of Jews in the Holy Land with numbers tattooed on their arms who would be more than willing to set him straight, but true, profound ignorance has never been bullied by empiricism, has it? What makes ignorance so scary is that you don’t even have to work for it. You can just trust somebody else to know shit for you. Certainly takes the pressure off the slow learners, but the problem with that model is that occasionally the person doing the thinking for you turns out to be Hitler. President Ahmadinejad is no Hitler, but his style of revisionist rhetoric is exactly the pile of crap from which issues the mushroom of atrocity. To his credit, President B swiftly and vociferously denounced President A’s comments, citing them as a prime example of Iran’s unsuitability as a keeper of the nuclear flame. It was a bold statement coming from a C student with a God fetish responsible for knocking off close to 30,000 people on the basis of bogus intelligence, but at least he was feinting in the direction of truth and justice. He probably missed the irony of Ahmadinejad’s freshly created myth coming a week before the Western world celebrates its oldest and most cherished one – a myth responsible for more deaths and misery than Hitler could ever conceive. Even if Bush got it, it’s unlikely his epiphany would have resulted in a swift condemnation of all myths. Myth busting is dangerous business. Fortunately there are a few brave souls who are on the side of truth and righteousness. One of those is Jerm Pollet, Mr. Sinus cast member, rock musician, and, as it turns out, cultural historian, who on Christmas Eve will be showing the final installment of Merry F%@#ing Xmas, his special Christmas porn show that exposes the pagan origins of Christmas. Go to this show and you’ll never see Christmas the same way again … unless you go to next year’s show.