Month: January 2019

Austin Symphony Fourth of July Concert and Fireworks

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JULY 4, 2002

Before you go speeding out of town to some rural backwater with a municipal ordinance that allows for the firing of rocket propelled grenades and whatnot, consider staying in Austin for the big fireworks display down at Zilker Park. Sure, the Zilker celebration is a daunting, 100,000 strong crush of locals, many with a fashion sense that calls into serious question the concept of freedom, but at least you won’t be a frazzled, neurotic mess from ducking bottle rockets and stamping out inadvertent brush fires. While it’s true that nothing exemplifies independence like cutting loose with your own private arsenal of colorful, Chinese-made pyrotechnics, the cost these days is downright staggering. By the time your punk has burned out, your overblown expectations and half your wallet have gone up in smoke. Why not invest those benjamins (be honest, you can’t throw up anything truly impressive for less than a c-note) in a new bandana for the Labrador, some plush lawn chairs, or maybe one of those giant coolers with wheels? That way you can kick back, listen to a little Tchaikovsky and stare up in slack jawed wonder at the brilliant spectacle above. Best of all, like America, it’s free.

Viva Las Vegas

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SAT. JUNE 29, 2002

So you threw all of your eggs in last Saturday’s big lottery basket and what do you have to show for it? Bupkis. Well don’t rip off that rabbit’s foot pendant just yet because Saturday night Aids Services of Austin is hosting its annual Viva! Las Vegas fundraiser at the Austin Music Hall. {ital}Viva! Las Vegas{/ital} offers all the fun of big time gambling without the obnoxious neon, dry desert air, and scary mobster types. You will however, get to sample a Vegas-style smorgasbord of great food from over twenty area restaurants like Mirabelle, Gilligan’s, Castle Hill, and Jean Luc’s Bistro; enjoy fabulous lounge acts like the Sin City Diva Show, Peter the Adequate, and The United Court as well as main stage shows featuring Carol Channing (live and imperson), The Roustabouts, and Mommas Boys (luck be a…uh…lady?). If you meet the mark of your dreams, you can get symbolically hitched by the Kang at Elvis’ “Love Me Tender” wedding chapel and furnish your honeymoon suite with loot from the silent auction. At the end of the evening when you’ve eaten too much, drank too much and blown all of your money on craps, you’ll rest easy knowing that you money went to a good cause. In the the immortal words of Rosie Perez in “White Men Can’t Jump”, “Sometimes when you lose you really win.”

Intergalactic Nemesis Redux

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JUN. 22, 2002

On 3rd Street, right behind the legendary, now defunct Electric Lounge is Gallery Lombardi, the quiet anchor in the “little corner that could” of the early to mid-nineties. These days the stylish, out-of-the-way gallery by the tracks is besieged by development, which should spell good news for local artists and culturati. The new attention is well deserved. For seven years under owner Ron Prince, Gallery Lombardi has supported local artists and the artistic community through a variety of events and exhibitions, both visual and otherwise. Prince himself is an artist and actor, and part of the operating expenses of the gallery are paid by royalties he receives from appearances on Laverne and Shirley. Through the month of June Gallery Lombardi features Salvage Vanguard Theater’s Intergalactic Nemesis Redux, a revival of its popular 1940’s style live radio serials about an impending alien invasion. The show features live sound effects by foley artists as well as music by the Golden Arm Trio (a.k.a. Chops Unlimited). Intergalactic Nemesis was written by Austinites Ray Colgan, Jessica Reisman, and Jason Neulander and rounded out by a talented local cast, so you can rest assured that you’re backing the home team when you cough up the $12 admission. If your wallet is a little light this month, take advantage of the Thursday night starving artist special where you can get in for half price with a canned food donation. Maybe you should take that can of creamed corn out on a date.

Kyle Spencer Book Reading

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FRI. JUNE 18, 2002

The corner of Sixth and Lamar has become something of a nexus of contemporary Chronicle culture. Some of the shaggy haunts of the early days are now in the midst of a slightly dressier, more refined middle age, much like their patrons. Waterloo Records made the move up the hill some time ago and has since been joined by heavyweights Whole Foods and Book People across the street. Each manages to attract a steady stream of Central Austinites and suburban interlopers in search not only of provisions, but a sense of cultural identity as well. On any given night, the corner is likely to host an in-store music performance, a cooking class, or a book signing. Such is the case Tuesday at Bookpeople, when journalist-turned-author Kyle Spencer blows into town to promote SHE’S GONE COUNTRY: Dispatches from a Lost Soul in the Heart of Dixie (Vintage, $13). The book is a memoir of sorts about Kyle’s move from the Big Apple to work at a newspaper in the relative Southern backwater of Raleigh-Durham. Once there, she encounters all manner of interesting freaks and customs that a quick trip to a Tarheels football game would have easily evinced, but Kyle, a writer to the core, discovers them the hard way: by dating. Tuesday night at 7pm she’ll host Girls Night Out: Heartbreak Southern Style where she’ll be reading some choice comedic passages and swapping worst breakup stories with the locals. Make sure and bring a pen because the best story will earn a “Heartbreak Recovery Package” containing bubble bath, chocolate, some tissues, and maybe even one of Kyle’s books.

Corey Feldman’s Truth Movement

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SAT. JUNE 8, 2002

In the late Eighties, Americans were divided into two distinct ideological and aesthetic camps defined by their choice of Corey: Haim or Feldman. Haim lovers were a bright eyed, gullible, optimistic lot inclined toward sweetness and sincerity. Feldman fans, on the other hand, were more jaded, pessimistic types who appreciated Feldman’s relatively acute sense of sarcasm and begrudgingly tolerated his occasional knuckleheaded antics and exceptionally bad haircuts. Unwittingly perhaps, the early Coreys represented a pop cultural yin-yang that by the early Nineties had merged into a nondescript, irrelevant grey ball. The Coreys’ swan song was unquestionably the 1992 abomination “Blown Away,” an arguably soft-core porn thriller in which the Coreys get to drive around a ski resort in a Porsche and boink Nicole Eggert. While the movie was very possibly the Coreys’ teen fantasy, it was a straight-to-video critical nightmare that effectively sealed the sarcophagus on the Coreys’ flagging film careers. Sure, they’ve each made some flicks since, but none with the chutzpah of “Blown Away.” It is perhaps commendable then that nearly a full decade later Feldman is still plugging away, musically at least, with his band “Corey Feldman’s Truth Movement.” The Truth Movement will be throwing down this Saturday at the Six of Clubs, ostensibly in support of their latest CD, “Still Searching for Soul.” The music has been described as “Pink Floyd influenced Soul,” which is probably worth a look at, if not a listen to, but regardless of the tunes, Saturday’s show should be brimming with equal amounts of irony and nostalgia if not appreciative, screaming fans.

Texas Pride Parade

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SAT. JUNE 1, 2002

If you’re not gay yet, this might be a good weekend to give it a try. Saturday and Sunday men and women from all across the Lone Star State will be converging on Austin celebrate Texas Pride weekend. If you want to kick things off a little earlier, you can start with the Dyke March, which will make its way from the Capitol steps to the Empanada Parlour Thursday night. For $5 you can hang out and enjoy the afterparty. Don’t take off your shoes just yet however, Saturday is the Texas pride Parade where possibly thousands of light loafers, comfortable shoes, and army boots will be padding down Congress Avenue in support of pink power. After a rousing rally on the capitol steps, you can kick up your heels at the Womens’ Dance at Fiesta Garden which runs from 7-12pm. A $10 donation gets you in the door. Maybe you’ll get lucky and meet someone to take to the Texas Pride Brunch the next morning. The brunch starts at 11am and for $25 you can nosh and hobnob with local and state political candidates. Or, you may just want to skip the brunch and go straight to the Texas Pride Festival where for $5 you can enjoy an all day smorgasbord of Austin talent emceed by former Big Boy Randy “Biscuit” Turner and Heather Gold. Some of the scheduled acts include the Sexy Finger Champs, Adult Rodeo, Susan Gibson, Austin Babtist Women, Sarah Hickman, and Patrice Pike. Augmenting the live music will be DJs Dig’m, Sue Johnson, and maybe even Filthy Rich as well as a drag show featuring James Perry (Miss Gay San Antonio), Paris Chanel, and Kelly Kline. With a lineup like that, you’re bound to be entertained regardless of your orientation, wouldn’t you say?

22 to Watch: New Art in Austin

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MAY 25, 2002

You’ll be baking in the sun soon enough even if you’re not a NASCAR fan. Why rush it? Memorial Day weekend the parks and pools are going to be overrun with white bellied, coconut oiled office larvae looking to get their first burn of the summer. If you could somehow drown the drunken rebel yells or calls of “Marco Polo,” you would hear the sound of skin sizzling like meat on a spit. Chill dawg. This weekend spend some quality time in the air-conditioned comfort of the Austin Museum of Art where you can enjoy the closing days of the “22 to Watch: New Art in Austin” exhibit. 22 to Watch provides an introduction to 22 new artists, all of whom live in or within a fifty mile radius of Austin (tough luck, Llano). Exhibiting artists were chosen not only by their geographical qualification, but by an exhaustive nine month curatorial selection process that reviewed the work of over seventy artists. All pieces in the exhibit were created within the last three years and represent a wide variety of artistic media and topics. If nothing else, this show promises to provide an interesting overview of what’s going on with visual art in the Austin area. Even if you didn’t have “visit an art gallery” on your Memorial Day to do list, this show is worth your time. Besides, you’ve got an extra day, live a little.

SPAMARAMA

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SAT. MAY 18, 2002

Back in 1995, Austin officially became know as SPAMTOWN, USA – Austin Minnesota, that is. Austin, Texas however, has been aspiring to that title since way back in 1978 when a motley group of potted pork lovers at the Soap Creek Saloon threw together the first-ever SPAM-O-RAMA. It wasn’t until the mid eighties that the legal types got involved and replaced the O with an A, but by then, the folks at Hormel HQ knew the fat was in the frying pan, so to speak. Ever since, our namesake to the north has only feinted at the kind of knuckleheaded slacker whimsy that brought us SPAMARAMA®.

Sure, Austin, Minnesota dedicated a SPAM® Museum in 2001 and hired some serious celebrity heavyweights like Marion Ross and Barbara Billingsley to pay homage to the pork, but compared to the wacky absurdity of SPAMARAMA®, that all just seems like disingenuous marketing tripe. Here in Austin, Texas the SPAMsters are as much about putting a pig on a poster as they are about putting potted pork on your plate, and that’s as it should be. Carving up pigs and squeezing them into tiny tin cans is serious business and bound to play on your conscience. Down here, several states removed from the carnage, we’re never too sullen to put on a potted pork party. That’s why you can count on a fun time out at Waterloo Park this Saturday. Not only will you enjoy music by Steven Bruton, the Damnnations, Greezy Wheels, and the Uranium Savages, you’ll also witness wacky events like the SPAM®alympics, the SPAM® jam, and feast on samples from the world famous SPAM® Cook-off. It’s enough to drive you to vegetarianism but is that so wrong?

Texas Greek Festival

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SAT. MAY 11, 2002

Austin is a diverse and exciting city. It’s the capital of Texas, true, but it’s also a college town. One need look no further than the giant, neoclassical limestone phallus on the hill to be reminded of the fact. That is why here, as in many other college towns in America, the term “Greek culture” is more likely to conjure up thoughts of keggers and hazing than mathematics and philosophy. Perhaps this is an ironic testament to the pervasiveness of ancient Greek culture, or perhaps it’s an indictment of our collective intelligence. Very likely it’s both. Whatever the case, these days authentic Greek culture gets short shrift, which is just one of the reasons the Austin Chapter of the American Hellenic Educational Progressive Association will be throwing a mixer this Saturday at Fiesta Gardens. OK, it’s much more than a mixer, actually it’s a full-on festival, complete with Greek food, bouzouki (look it up) music, folk dancing, cultural exhibits and an arts and crafts bazaar. Not only that, but $5 gets you in the festival from noon to midnight. It’s a safe bet that no one is going to call you to the carpet for wearing a toga, but if you plan on binge drinking, doing the gator, and swatting subordinates with a paddle, you might want to check into something a little closer to campus.

Kids in the Hall

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SUN. APR. 27, 2002

As Howie Mandel proves time and again, Canadians are pretty funny even when they’re not trying to be funny. Sure, Canada has its Dan Akroyds, its Martin Shorts, its Tom Greens and its Mike Meyers – and they’re all pretty silly, but for the real gut laughs you look to serious Canadians like William Shatner, Kiefer Sutherland, Raymond Burr and Keanu Reeves. Nothing is more rib-tickling than sitting on the couch getting stoned, eating Funyuns and watching Ironsides – nothing that is, except Kids in the Hall, who are bringing their wacky sketch comedy to the Backyard this Saturday. If by some strange coincidence you’ve been living under a rock for the last decade, the Kids in the Hall are five cross-dressing Canadians: Dave Foley, Kevin McDonald, Bruce McCullough, Mark McKinney and Scott Thompson whose eponymously titled television series from the early nineties earned them both a rabid fan base and a seriously cool theme song penned by the now defunct instrumental rock group Shadowy Men from a Shadowy Planet. The kids have all since gone on to successful careers in film and television but have somehow found the wherewithal to take their comedy on the road. This may just be the biggest Canadian touring act this year, and if the Texas humidity doesn’t kill them, they will certainly slay you.